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Counterpoint: Anything is Possible if You Really Try
By: A Blithering Idiot

Some people are sad because they don't think they can do things they want to do, but I bet they haven't really tried, because anything is possible if you really try. For example, I wanted to meet my favorite American Idol Taylor Hicks and I did at the county fair last month because I tried to go there and I did. If I hadn't gone to the fair then I never would have met him because he wasn't coming to my house. I also want to be a tractor driver someday and I will because anything is possible if you really try, and I'm going to try real hard.

Some people say they tried really hard to do something they wanted to do and it still didn't come true, but that's probably because they didn't put their mind to it, which is an important part to really trying. I don't think trying without putting your mind to it is really trying, so that doesn't count.

Another thing that you should always do is to think positively, because if you think negatively then bad things will happen but if you think positively then good things will happen. For example, one night when I was really angry because I couldn't go to Taco Bell my pet hamster died, and since I learned the power of positive thinking I've been to Taco Bell a bunch more times because they opened a new one closer to my house and I have a new pet lizard that's not dead yet.

I also think birthday parties are fun. Whether it’s your own birthday or somebody else’s, I think its exciting to get together with friends and have a party with lots of cake and presents. I remember when I was a kid I had a birthday party with a magician who pulled a present out of a hat for me, and you know what it was? It was a Tonka Big Scoop Front Shovel Steel Tractor - just what I wanted!

Furthermore, I'd rather be a chicken than a jailbird, which is why I say no to drugs and you should to. Drugs are bad for you and highly illegal.

Finally, whether the big hat of life has a tractor in it for you or just a big lump of stinky mistake mess, you should remember that it's all part of God's plan and not to get so upset over it that you go and jump off the Golden Gate Bridge like my dad, because then you'll go to hell instead of heaven, which is a wonderful paradise up in the clouds where Taylor Hicks sings all day beside a mountain of Nacho Cheese Chalupas.